I am taking some time away from the computer at night.  I will try to take plenty of pics of the kids to upload in the mornings!  

Lent

Tomorrow begins the season of Lent.  I have never celebrated Lent myself, probably because every church I have ever attended has been Baptist and I don't think they celebrate Lent.  I honestly don't know much about it, except that it is a season of penance, of grief, to culminate in the glory of Jesus' death and resurrection  at Easter.  The forty days leading up to Easter is a time of prayer, sacrifice, fasting, generosity, striving to become closer to God.  I am not sure yet exactly what we will do.  I do know that I desire to become more steadfast in prayer.  I read on a fave blog of mine about the 40 trash bag challenge... click here  

I am going to strive to do this.  I have really been wanting to de-clutter and simplify my life lately... there is too much "STUFF" in our lives around here.

Life is....... EXCITING..... everyday...... the best thing going on around here in our lives is that Trey and I are closer than ever in our marriage, and we are closer to God than we have ever been...... choices are being considered and decisions are being made......  possibly the best decisions of our lives.......

Bible study

As always.... bible study was a blessing.  Thank you Lord for these women you have graciously brought into my life.

Happy Birthday Roar!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BABY GIRL!  (will post pics when camera is up and running!)

Open to life

What does open to life mean?  I have figured out that it means different things to different people.  Before I had children I was very pro-choice... take that how you will.  I never "believed" in abortion for myself.  I would never had made that choice.  But I didn't think it was right to limit the choices of women who felt that decision was best for them for whatever reasons.  Now, of course, I am very pro-life... ever since I saw the first ultrasound of my first baby girl!  I just feel that if every women contemplating abortion could just see/hear their baby's heartbeat we'd have fewer abortions in this country.  This has been a topic of many conversations over the past few months...

I have also had some interesting conversations in the last few months about babies, big families, etc.  There are some families who are more than happy to stop at the two requisite children, and then I know some who are so ecstatic at the prospect of accepting however many souls that the Lord blesses them with.  But here's the kicker... it is the ones open to the multiple blessings of the Lord that seem to be the less judgmental about other family size choices.  Don't get me wrong... I also know plenty of people who are happy with two children in their families that don't judge those who want more.  But it's the ones who criticize other's choices that have really been sticking with me lately.  I have heard more than one person lately criticize those having more than 2 and the more  I think about it the more it bothers me.  Who am I to judge other peoples desires to have more children?  Who are they to do so?  A good friend of mine said something so poignant that I wish I had thought of it, but alas I did not :)  BUT I will use it in the future.... hahahaha!  Here is what it was... "What's so infuriating is that a person is so willing to judge / criticize someone for CHOOSING to have another baby, but if I was to have made the CHOICE to kill my baby (abortion) than that would have been okay?"

The truth is, children love us so completely and without restriction.  They fill our lives with so much joy and LOVE...  and there is no LIFE without LOVE in it.  My brother and I have always been so much to our parents and our Nana.  And my nana's grandkids and now great grandkids are EVERYTHING to her...  isn't that a nice vision?  To have  lived a love-filled life, and then be surrounded by the blessings of grandkids and great grandkids?  That is my dream... TONS of grandkids!  Trey just laughs at me and has since before we got married.  He says we won't be able to afford all the grandkids that I dream about...  but I would love nothing more than a house filled with love...  anyone ever see the movie Dan in Real Life?  I LOVE the scene where the WHOLE family puts on their own talent show!  That's what I want to do with my children and their children, and God willing, their children's children!  That's what open to life means to me.  

Trey and I weren't prepared when we got pregnant with Jace, but it was the plan that God had for us.  I remember distinctly saying the night of our rehearsal dinner that it would be 5 years before we started having kids!  HA!  God showed us... we were pregnant within a month (and yes, we were "careful")!  Well, the Lord had started our family for us before we thought "WE" were ready, but he obviously knew that we were.  He knew it was the right time for Jacelyn Hollis Holmes to be here.  And then 20 months later He knew it was time for Rory Hart Holmes to be here (her we helped plan).  And tomorrow she'll be 1!  Time flies...  People thought and expressed their opinions even then about our forming miracle but I could not imagine my life without either of them.  God has such great, big, wonderful, EXTRAORDINARY plans for these children of ours and His.

I guess I should have specified that I know several people who feel like toddlers shouldn't act this way...  they always start out their sentences with, "When I was that age, I didn't act like that."  or "my kids didn't act like that at that age." etc...  lol

Here's something I read on yahoo today:

"10 Signs Your Children Are Brats:

1.    They resort to crying or yelling when they want something.

2.    They throw themselves on floor and won't get up.

3.    They constantly throw tantrums or even hit you when you punish them.

4.    They ignore you when you ask a question.

5.    They are rude to other adults and even to other children.

6.    They refuse to share toys or treats with other children.

7.    They are show-offs and are constantly trying to one-up their peers to be the center of        attention.

8.    They always want whatever everyone else has.  Once they have it, they want something        new.

9.    They keep a messy room and never help out around the house despite your pleas for them        to do so.

10.)  They refuse to go to bed."

SERIOUSLY!?!  

Does this sound like familiar behavior to anyone else?  I mean, don't get me wrong... Jace certainly DOES NOT act like this always.  BUT she definitely has her moments where she has probably acted like all of the above on occasion.  Would I classify her a brat?  No.  Would others?  I don't think so.  And if they do, then they certainly haven't told me.

So do you these behaviors make a brat?  Or do the parents who LET them continuously act this way make a brat?

Broken camera

Well, the camera is broken...  sorry to disappoint everyone who has been wondering where new pics of the girls are.  Hopefully, this will be remedied soon :)

Jace was so sweet today... I love days like that.  I finally made up my mind that she is going to go to preschool in the fall.  I have been wavering back and forth about it for a while but finally today realized that she would LOVE it.  I know I am perfectly capable of teaching her myself... that isn't what this is about.  This is about Jace, and I think she would thrive on a little time away from me.  It's only tuesdays and thursdays from 8:30 - 11:30.  I think I will survive the 6 hours without her (thought it may take some getting use too :)!!!

Rory LOVES baby dolls... she rocks them and talks to them and hums/sings to them.  I think she is my mothering/nurturing child.  Jace is like a pitt bull in a china shop---- (just like her momma!)  Roar also LOVES the kitchen playset that Jace got for Christmas 2 Christmas' ago...  which Jace has shown very little interest in.  We had moved it to Jace's room out of the play area for a while but we are going to have to move it back because she doesn't want to let Roar in her room to play with it.  Or I may move it to Rory's room... 

I took the girls to see Bic at the office today... they both love to go to "Daddy's office" which is funny because he is actually so rarely there.  Vicki (Bic) had been digging through some of her old pics and found this picture of herself from where she was around Jace's age.... it is ASTONISHING how much Jace looks like her.  I've always thought she looks like Vicki, but seeing this pic of her from her childhood cemented my opinion!  Which is not a bad thing, Bic is very pretty (my brother once called her HOT!)  lol

To me, of course, my girls are BEAUTIFUL!  And they look so different from each other, to me at least... Jace is darker--- darker skin, darker eyes, darker hair.  Roar is fairer--- fair skin (like her daddy and uncle matt and pop), blue/green/gray eyes (yes, ALL those colors), and strawberry blonde/reddish hair.  and neither one looks like me... at least in my opinion.  Isn't it amazing how God can create from the same 2 people such different souls?  They each received the same amounts of mine and Trey's DNA and yet are so utterly unique.  From conception, they have been unique individuals... 

Life is awesome :)

take a moment...

read this...

today

Jace had a good day... even if she did climb onto the kitchen counter for the millionth time and pop open a capsule of silica gel beads and eat some!  So when do they quit putting everything into their mouths!?!

Roar is definitely TEETHING... GRUMPY this morning but this afternoon was much better...

They played with some relatively new friends today and Jace asked all day to go to their house and eat lunch!!

What was funny to me was that she had fun but can't understand when people come over here to play and there is no Katie or Reagan...  but why?  That's what she asks every time...

I have some prayer requests:

Trey's nephew, Rush, underwent heart surgery yesterday... they think his cancer has come back.  Please pray for him... he just recently turned 30... still so young and has COMPLETE faith in our Lord.

And my Nana has recently undergone surgery to clean out her MRSA infection site... please pray for quick recovery for her so that she can get her hip replacement redone soon... She really wants to be well and to walk again.

thanks...

funny tidbit

okay, so there are a few things we spank for.  screaming at mommy or daddy hatefully... being deliberately mean (hitting, pulling, pushing) to anyone (mainly Roar), and really that's the main things.  today she was screaming at me defiantly and hatefully and I told her to stop.  she, of course, said no...  so I said "Do you want a spanking?"  and do you know what my first born did?  she turned her back to me and lifted up her dress to show me her butt!!!!!!!  maybe I should try another tactic???  it took EVERYTHING I had not to laugh at her because she was being so coy about it too!

(VERY, VERY, VERY RAMBLY just a warning)  today has been just a day, but like every day should be celebrated.  although I cried today.  I hate to cry.  but I must have reached a boiling point or something.  and my poor children... jace busted her lip open today on the mini trampoline... it was TERRIBLE.  And bled all over Jessica... it's a true friend that will let your child bleed all over them :)  Jace now has 2 little teeth imprints on her lower lip... then she tipped the piano bench on her toes... then aubie was too excited and stuck her eye and scratched her face with her toenails...  my poor child.  She didn't nap and was in bed at 5:30...  Rory is teething and walking and falling... she is definitely unhappy and she is LETTING ME KNOW...  her poor head is covered in bruises too.  she didn't nap well because the neighbors were out of school, thus playing basketball outside her window during nap time... no big deal... she was in bed by 6:20.  of course that means they will probably be up at 6:00!

bible study tonight was, as always, a huge BLESSING.  although that's one of the places I cried today...  I hate crying in FRONT of people.  but no big deal... that's what my friends are there for and God did bring these special women into my life for a reason.  I feel like everything is changing...  but as Trey so astutely pointed out today that was the purpose of life..lol THANKS TREY!  :)  and speaking of friends.... I  MISS MY BEST FRIEND AMANDA SO MUCH... AND NOW MY OTHER ONE IS MOVING (most likely).  BUt bible study has become such a priority in my life... I hate it when we miss a week or two... I totally rearrange my life now for it.  and am thankful that they rearrange the time for me to do this bootcamp right now.

and speaking of...boot camp was good... didn't want to go but I did anyways.  I lost 2.5 more lbs... which is good because I didn't think I had lost ANY.  I feel better exercising and anyone reading this should remind me of this often, if not EVERY day.  I really wish I could do the camp again but it's not looking like it will be in the budget.  In fact, if not for my mom paying for this one I wouldn't have done it.  so THANKS MOM!  I am just going to have to write BIG notes to put everyone to exercise and push myself every day on my own.

and speaking of stuff not fitting in budgets---- the truth is we need a new dryer.  when our old broke we bought a used one to save money.  well our lesson learned is that we should have just bought a new one.  the one we bought is awful and we have to run 3 dry cycles to dry anything thus I am only getting 3 loads done a day (IF I AM LUCKY)... now while I am prepared to deal with this... to take up my cross... its FADING our clothes...  so not only am I still behind from when the first one broke (never got up after getting this new old one), it takes way too long to dry anything, and is aging our clothes faster.  and we are out the $100+ we spent on it... oh well... lesson learned.  We have a generous offer for someone to buy us a new one but I don't know...

business could be better... understatement for a whole lot of people in this country right now.  BUT I am so THANKFUL and PROUD of my husband.  because the truth is he's a GOOD man.  He's the BEST man in my life.  He could so easily give up and be lazy but he's not.  He gets up every day and he works for US...  he is out there EVERY DAY doing all that he can, for US.  Trey and I need to give it too God... we need to let go of our fear and worry and stress and give it up to the Lord.  Maybe that is our lesson in all this--- to fully rely on God --- to never question HIS promise to provide what we need.  The truth is in the broad spectrum of life there are so many people in this world worse off than us... we are obviously not going to starve and God has definitely provided us always what we need.  My biggest thing is my fear, and maybe feelings of inadequacy.  But even if I were to get a job there is nothing paying what I would need to provide for my family and justify daycare for my kids....  one of the blogs I read actually had a great post on stress and fear that I read when I got home tonight.  this woman is so inspiring to me.  

I am thankful for great friends and a wonderful family.  my kids are happy, healthy, fed (although Rory acts like she is starved and eats ALL day), clothed and have a roof over their heads.  I don't know what we do without our mothers... my mom is only a phone call away and is so generous to my kids and us and we wish she was able to be around more often (but she'll be here in about a week---YAAAY)... and Vicki is also only a phone call away and so generous with her time.  Not to mention she cleaned our house yesterday... the BEST gift ever because sometimes I am so caught up with the kids and too tired at the end of the day to be bothered.

No matter how much mothers may drive us crazy (as I am sure I will one day do to my own girls) they are always there.  honour thy father and mother... there is a reason it is one of the 10 commandants...

Sleeping Angels...

Trey

oh, and today is Trey's birthday!!!  HAPPY BIRTHDAY TREY!

Marriage...Love...Babies...

I look at my children and I still see them as they looked when they were newborns.  It's hard to imagine that Roar will be 1 in a week and Jace will be 3 in June...  I love my children more than I thought possible.  I never once worried if I would be able to love my second born as much as my first.  And this is a very real concern for a lot of women these days, the idea that they can love a second baby as much as their first.  I didn't have "to make room" in my heart.  It got me thinking of the magnitude of Christ's love for ALL of us.  He doesn't pick and choose among us, he just loves.  Infinitely.  Undeniably.  Completely.  This is how I feel for my children.  It's a glimmer of Heaven for me... this all encompassing joy of my children.  Children are a privilege from the Lord... they are the fruit of marriage : a sacred love.  "Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord, the fruit of the womb is a reward.  Like arrows in in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth.  Happy is the man who has a quiver full of them: they shall not be ashamed."  Psalm 127: 3-5  

It is only through God's grace that we are married and take on the God given responsibilities of becoming one flesh... and through our holy union, again by God's grace, are we blessed with children.  Trey and I have made a commitment before God to join together, and to multiply for the glory of the Lord.  We are committed to building our home with the grace of God...  Marriage is not intended to be easy, but it is intended to bring us closer to Christ.  "God intends for marriage to be both romantic and redemptive.  God aims to rid us of selfishness.  He uses difficulties in marriage  to melt away the dross in our lives, or as the writer of Hebrews puts it, God chastens us, 'for our profit, that we may be partakers of His holiness.  Now no chastening seems to be joyful for the present, but painful; nevertheless, afterward it yields the peaceable fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it' (Heb. 12:10, 11)." God intends for our marriages to reflect His image to a world that desperately needs to see who He is.  "So God created man in His own image: in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them" Gen. 1:26, 27.  I read somewhere the Hebrew word for mirror means "to reflect God, to magnify, exalt, and glorify Him."  I take this to mean that we should focus on His words, "in His own image" and apply this to our marriages with the respect that we should within our marriages adhere to God's will for us and treat our spouses in such a way that it will "reflect, magnify, exalt, and glorify" God.  These are the standards to which we should hold our spouses, and especially ourselves, too.

Picture Thoughts

ENJOYING EACH OTHER....

SHARING SWEETLY....

ROAR'S FAVORITE PAST TIME...

WHY BUY TOYS....

JACE DRESSED HERSELF...

Continual Conversion

I have been reading alot lately about sin and a need for a continual conversion of our hearts away from sin.  Here are some thoughts that I keep pondering....

"Jesus calls every person to turn away from sin and to turn towards him - that is, to convert.  This conversion requires not only change in one's actions but also a conversion of heart, a radical change of being.  In the conversion of heart, one changes from being "dead to sin" to "alive... in Christ Jesus" (Rom 6:11), from a child of wrath (see Eph 2:3) to a child of God (see Gal 4:5-7).

We cannot change (convert) our own hearts, and so conversion is first a work of God, the one who "will circumcise your heart and the heart of your offspring, so that you will love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul, so that you may live" (Dt 30:6).  God "circumcises our hearts" in Baptism, when we are cleansed from sin and made children of God, "fellow heirs with Christ" (Rom 8:17) , and "partakers of the divine nature" (2 Pt 1:4).  God gives to each person the grace for conversion, to choose either to accept or reject.  By a response of faith, the person accepts this gift of conversion, and by doing penance, cooperates with this grace.

Penance is any act which assists the Christian to turn away from sin and toward Jesus.  Whenever we sincerely do penance, we cooperate with the grace of conversion.  We will rejoice in our sufferings for the sake of Christ and experience a willingness to complete in our own bodies "what is lacking in Christ's afflictions" (Col 1:24; see also Phil 3:8).  Our penance thus expresses an interior conversion.

Scripture suggests three forms of penance:  fasting, prayer, and almsgiving (see TB 12:8, Mt 6:1-18).  Fasting cooperates with the grace of conversion in one's individual life, prayer cooperates with the grace of conversion in one's life with God, and almsgiving cooperates with the grace of conversion on one's life with others.  Traditional fasting means abstaining from food for a given period of time to draw closer to God.  Some people fast on bread and water alone as a way of teaching that Christ alone is the soul's only real nourishment.  Almsgiving means giving money (or food, clothing, etc.) to the poor.  The Church teaches that we must recognize Christ in the poorest of the poor.  These are his brothers and sisters; as members of his Body, we must care for them.  Furthermore, the practice of penance in one form affects the other two.  For example, if we pray with true repentance, we will desire to change our way of life and will change the way we treat others.

Because of ever-present human weakness and sin, continual conversion is necessary.  Someone who truly desires to cooperate with God's grace need only utter a prayer like, "how can I love you more, Lord Jesus?"  and many ideas will surely come to mind.  Scripture teaches that crying tears of repentance (see Lk 7:37-48), "love for one another" (1 Pt 4:8), and "bring[ing] back a sinner from the error of his way" (Jas 5:20) each "covers a multitude of sins" (1 Pt 4:8; see also Jas 5:, and 20).  Other ways to accomplish conversion are receiving the Eucharist, reading Scripture, praying the Rosary or any other devotion, worshipping Jesus in the Blessed Sacrament, praying the Liturgy of the Hours, examining one's conscience, caring for the poor, giving money and time to those in need, seeking and following spiritual direction, visiting the lonely, practicing self-denial, and patient acceptance of suffering and persecution."  ( taken from a handout printed by The Association for Catechumenal Ministry; ACM)

Sin in our world is massive and consuming, and without realizing it we can become so indifferent to the reality of sin that we become dismissive of God's will and assume authority of our own lives.  The more indifferent and dismissive we become as a society, the harder it becomes for people to acknowledge their own sin and need for salvation.  Mankind has become so egotistical that we have willfully ignored God's intentions for our lives here on earth and instead try to assert our own desires.  Trey has asserted to me many times that most churches today have become nothing more to people than places where they can practice a faith of convenience.  The idea behind his description is really quite disturbing for me... and after a while I realized that he has a point.  There seems to lack a cohesiveness of beliefs among Christians today, and it seems like every one wants to assume their own authority in their faith and religion.  And the only truth for me is that the only real authority is God himself and Christ our Lord, and the Church that Christ set up for us on this earth.  People want to fit Christ around their schedules and want him to adapt to their lives when the truth is we NEED to center our lives on Christ.  It may not always be convenient but it is always what God desires for us.  It is only through Christ and trying to live by his example that we will ever find true spiritual nourishment. And without the true spiritual nourishment that God enabled us to have through his sacrifice of Christ, and the sacrifice that Christ gave to us of himself on the cross, the lives we lead will be nothing but an empty passage through time.  

Rory

Rory's first birthday is the 23rd of this month :)  And she has recently started walking!!!  Trey said she looks like a smurf when she walks.  HAHAHA!  She is really so tiny.  She is still in size 3 diapers with room to spare, whereas Jace was in size 5 by the time she turned one!  And she is so short and petite and just plain CUTE!  We finally figured out about a month ago that if we lay her in the bean bag with her bottle than she would finish it... we have been battling her for months to get her to finish bottles!  I guess she didn't want us holding them for her... she really is already little miss independent, like her sister, mother & both grandmothers!!!  Poor Trey... surrounded by all these strong willed females... no wonder he's grumpy sometimes!  HAHAHAHAHAHA!

Mommy's girls'

I don't post many pictures of myself, simply because I don't like many of the pics that are taken of me.  But this picture makes me smile because my children are being such momma girls!  I have recently started a boot camp that meets 3 times a week for a 6 week period.  I am doing that in conjunction with working out at the Y on my off days from boot camp.  I am hoping to do this boot camp for at least one or two more six week periods to get into a better routine of exercising.  Jace does not like that I leave her 3 times a week at night.  She is always asking me not to leave, but I just tell her that mommy has to go get healthy for her and Rory...

today

See these faces?  This was most of our day... Rory has like 6 teeth coming in so she's just grumpy and Jace was constantly bothering her so she stayed in trouble ALL day!  It was almost enough to drive me to drink... almost.

Siblings

Funny tidbit from today...  Jace informed me that she wanted a baby brother name Michael.  Out of nowhere... granted we were watching Peter Pan so I think that's where she got the name from.  So then I said "What!?"  and she said it again.  So playing along, I said "Well what would you name another sister?"  She said, "Rory!"  I told her she already had a baby sister name Rory, so what would she want to name another sister.  She clearly and defiantly informed me, "I don't want another sister!  NO MORE SISTERS!  I want a brother----MICHAEL!"  She ended the statement in an extremely LOUD voice...  I sadly had to inform her that she had no control over that!  HAHAHAHA